Outside of the shuttle bus windows, a newly born dark covers the largo water of Charles, glitterng lights around banks reminding me of the first sight of New England from the windows of 6000 miles above when I reached a month ago. You cannot imagine how reluctant I showed my excitement upon the gorgeous landscape of Coastal Boston's lights network, shaped like tremendous spiders, around eleven at night after more than 20 hours time-confused flights and "interesting" visa stories in England. Anyway here, with the so-called upmost human civilization, is the new one. More than 400 years ago, dozens of protestants, well educated and well being, made their way here with a hope. Today that hope makes the Northeast the richest states in the country, both in wealth and in knowledge.

 

The school bus kept moving. The atmosphere of Christmas is tiptoeing in early on street trees. If you get a chance to see the Korean movie Il Mare, the dramatic sense of a light-decorated tree can easily spring up in your mind. The movie is about a love story happened in overlaped times and spaces, though little to do with the sea as entitled. Sea is here in Boston, the sea of jingle bulbs. Big pine trees near Harvard Yard and the Square have already been blinking during the night, which makes me feel a little warm off wild winds going back home.

 

Before the Lamont stopped the bus. I got off, crossed the street, and rushed into the Au Bon Pain. Although it is famous for the bread, the café also serves bowls of rice, which is the very reason I like it. The rice bowl series has a strong and popular name, harvest. Then after a day's hard work, I prefer to enjoy my harvest here. Surrounded in Jazz, which is Uncle's favorite I used to laugh at, I recall the only book store nearby displays the books of Adorno and on Adorno over prominent shelves. I miss Taipei now. Then I miss China. Thousands of miles across the sea, it is 11 hours ahead of me in future. Do my family and friends enjoy the sunshine there......

每个人都有不同的活法，正如每个人死的姿势都不同。死只有一瞬。我喜欢埃及太阳教里对生死的解释，说两者都是上天为你打开的门，在你打开另一扇门之前，你要走的路就是活着。

 

干嘛总是要装深沉呢？不如换个轻松些的。一只大象问骆驼:“你的咪咪怎么长在背上？”骆驼说:“死远点，我不和鸡鸡长在脸上的东西讲话！”你看，每个东西都有自己的活法。何必铁了心认死理。文化者，化成天下，视角决定了建构的路径。

 

有没有想过现在的职业是不是适合你？或许当了律师，却像莫尔说的那样；当了医生，却像鲁迅说的那样；当了教授，却不也像我期望的那样。职业和兴趣之间，有着微妙的樊篱，像是有位大学者的关于婚姻与爱情合作关系的譬喻。

 

“皇帝招我做女婿，路远迢迢我不去。”余华*的活着，乐里藏着苦，苦和乐并没有所谓，因为中国人经历了太多的苦，是个自诩爱吃苦瓜的民族。可是真的有人想过凭什么要受那么多苦，怎么不受苦吗？

 

小的时候，妈妈想让我当医生，后来我毅然决然地选择了从文的道路。曾经和一个被公推为很有学者气质的好友，辩论过学术之于中国的必要。或者也是悲哀吧。我似乎没能说服他。但是这条道路在我看来，还是有现实意义的。

 

昨天，一个关于亚洲现代性的研讨会上，一个老外读着鲁迅的坟，而且一直强调是我写的（他发音的关系），致使我觉得有重读这些文字的必要了，虽然我曾经一度不喜欢其言语偏激。

 

有的人活着，他已经死了；有的人死了，他还活着。 

（*想着呐喊就写成余杰了，多谢fionna提醒）

枫叶红了的季节，

初到康桥。

厚厚的草甸上，

踩着懒懒的阳光。

盛夏的影子，

如同熟悉的陌生，

伴随五瓣的叶片，

飘落，

路旁的水坑里，

橙色的云。